Leonato
                                                
                                                
                                                    What would you with me, honest neighbour?
                                                
                                                
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Dogberry
                                                
                                                
                                                    Marry, sir, I would have some confidence with you that decerns you nearly.
                                                
                                                
                                                            
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        A malapropism for ‘conference’ (talk).
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        A malapropism for ‘concerns’.
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                        
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Leonato
                                                
                                                
                                                    Brief, I pray you. For you see it is a busy time with me.
                                                
                                                
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Dogberry
                                                
                                                
                                                    Marry, this it is, sir.
                                                
                                                
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Verges
                                                
                                                
                                                    Yes, in truth it is, sir.
                                                
                                                
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Leonato
                                                
                                                
                                                    What is it, my good friends?
                                                
                                                
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Dogberry
                                                
                                                
                                                    Goodman Verges, sir, speaks a little off the matter - an old man, sir, and his wits are not so blunt as, God help, I would desire they were, but, in faith, honest as the skin between his brows.
                                                
                                                
                                                            
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        A man below the social rank of gentleman.
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        A malapropism for ‘sharp’.
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                        
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Verges
                                                
                                                
                                                    Yes, I thank God, I am as honest as any man living that is an old man, and no honester than I.
                                                
                                                
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Dogberry
                                                
                                                
                                                    Comparisons are odorous, palabras, neighbour Verges.
                                                
                                                
                                                            
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        Malapropism for ‘odious’ (repulsive).
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        Speak more clearly or briefly.
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                        
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Leonato
                                                
                                                
                                                    Neighbours, you are tedious.
                                                
                                                
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Dogberry
                                                
                                                
                                                    It pleases your worship to say so, but we are the poor duke’s officers. But truly, for mine own part, if I were as tedious as a king, I could find it in my heart to bestow it all of your worship. 
                                                
                                                
                                                            
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        Dogberry thinks ‘tedious’ means ‘wealthy’.
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                        
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Leonato
                                                
                                                
                                                    All thy tediousness on me, ah?
                                                
                                                
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Dogberry
                                                
                                                
                                                    Yea, an 'twere a thousand times more than 'tis, for I hear as good exclamation on your worship as of any man in the city, and though I be but a poor man, I am glad to hear it.
                                                
                                                
                                                            
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        Loud complaint. Dogberry means ‘acclamation’.
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                        
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Leonato
                                                
                                                
                                                    I would fain know what you have to say.
                                                
                                                
                                                            
                                                            
                                                        
                                                        
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Verges
                                                
                                                
                                                    Marry, sir, our watch last night, excepting your worship's presence, have ta'en a couple of as arrant knaves as any in Messina.
                                                
                                                
                                                            
                                                            
                                                        
                                                        
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Dogberry
                                                
                                                
                                                    A good old man, sir, he will be talking. As they say, ‘When the age is in, the wit is out.’ God help us, it is a world to see. Well said, i' faith, neighbour Verges; well, God's a good man, an two men ride of a horse, one must ride behind. An honest soul, i' faith, sir, by my troth he is, as ever broke bread. But, God is to be worshipped, all men are not alike, alas, good neighbour!
                                                
                                                
                                                            
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        Dogberry is misquoting the proverb ‘when the ale is in, the wit is out.’
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                            
                                                        
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        Proverb meaning ‘there can be only one leader’.
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        Proverb meaning ‘as any other’.
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                        
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Leonato
                                                
                                                
                                                    Indeed, neighbour, he comes too short of you.
                                                
                                                
                                                            
                                                            
                                                        
                                                        
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Dogberry
                                                
                                                
                                                    Gifts that God gives.
                                                
                                                
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Leonato
                                                
                                                
                                                    I must leave you.
                                                
                                                
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Dogberry
                                                
                                                
                                                    One word, sir: our watch, sir, have indeed comprehended two auspicious persons, and we would have them this morning examined before your worship.
                                                
                                                
                                                            
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        Malapropism for 'apprehended', meaning 'caught'.
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        Promising. Dogberry means 'suspicious'.
                                                                    
                                                                 
                                                             
                                                        
                                                        
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Leonato
                                                
                                                
                                                    Take their examination yourself and bring it me; I am now in great haste, as it may appear unto you.
                                                
                                                
                                             
                                        
                                            
                                                
                                                    Dogberry
                                                
                                                
                                                    It shall be suffigance.
                                                
                                                
                                                            
                                                            
                                                                
                                                                    
                                                                    
                                                                        Dogberry means 'sufficient' (enough).